Yesterday I met Mr Brainwash – today I feel confused.  Not the usually befuddlement I have in my everyday life – but a different type.  Did I meet Mr Brainwash?  Yes I did.  Did I rub his tummy – yes – I’m afraid I did that too.  Did I meet the artist of the “Life is Beautiful” exhibition in Holborn?  Erm, I’m not actually too sure!

You may have flushed – but something tells me you haven’t washed your hands.

For those of you unfamiliar with Mr Brainwash  (aka Thierry Guetta), his story is highlighted in “Exit Through the Gift Shop” – a natty documentary by the elusive stencil spray painted artist Banksey.  Speculation has arisen, arosed and arised that this film could quite possibly be a mockumentary.  Why?  I think that instead of me sticking and pasting the whole of the Wikipedia’s delights on this page, may I politely suggest you look it up yourself – or better still – purchase your own DVD player and hire the film.  Go on, do it now!  I’ll know if you haven’t as I have secretly been filming you for a number of weeks now and it’s nice to know that you’re taking your vitamins and are regular with your bowel movements.

As the Police once told me “I’ll be watching you!”

So let’s just say that Mr Brainwash is an artist and not somebody dressed up in a Mickey Mouse costume for the sake of those who haven’t seen the film (It will make for a slightly easier journey into the warbles of my written wordings on the matter in hand) …

Mickey after decapitating his entire family – Oh, can’t be him – he has clean gloves.

… and welcome one and all to Mr. Brainwash’s Solo art tour! Held at the Old Sorting Office on New Oxford street.  You can hardly miss it – as it has scrawlings of legitimate graffiti all over it and a big picture of our good Queen Liz holding a can of spray paint for good measure.

I don’t care who you are! Vandalism is vandalism! Naughty!

On entry, your bags are checked for any artistry utensils and confiscated until further notice, in order to prevent any hanky panky graffiti-ings of your own desire.  I had my much cherished  brown felt tip pen removed from my clutch – (the most fun I’ve had in years).  Cameras are allowed  – which is a great bonus to those who like to take professional blurred photos like my kind self.  And look!  See here!  The Krankies are here (in rubber swinging attire) to give you a warm welcome …

… And also with you. Is that a light saber, or are you just pleased to see me?

Cars and letter boxes pretending to be London gift shop gifts (or perhaps we have turned temporally into the Burrowers – god, I hope not – what a bore), bastardised historical pictures featuring contemporary faces of singers and actors.  Da Vinci to Dali get a make over.  And spray cans promising the offering of instant hits of brown sauce to coffee – rip off Warhol?  Rip off everything?  Who cares!  Where’s Wally?  I didn’t know Mother Teresa went to school with James Brown and ET!  What would Mary Secole say?

Souvenir London Telephone Box – comes with startled posable man.

Should you go?  Yes!  Methinks you should!  It is a free and fun exhibition featuring the british likes of the Beatles, the queen and the real royals about town Queen Victoria and her long loyal subject David to name but very few.

Well Posh.

There is also a smattering of Michael Jackson and Arnold Schwarzenegger (both sporting a Marilyn Monroe hair piece – never has Mr Jackson RIP ever looked so stunning).  It’s a brilliant exhibition and not up its own bum – just the way I take my art but not my men.  The art is not explicit in content (perverts be warned) so is something you can take the kids to see, although there is a danger that they may be expecting a free gift shop and fizzy drink next time you take them to the National Gallery.  Considering that the Tate Modern are charging £15 a pop to enter the Damian Hurst exhibition, here at Mr. Brainwash’s you can see a slighly drippy copy of Hurst’s “Dots” and purchase your very own free postcard of it ta boot.  Joy!  Did you encounter problems in getting tickets for the Olympics?  Well, didn’t we all love!  Have a look at the Olympic paint pots and do a jog or two.

Ahhh! The smell of fast food and fizzy drinkage.

It’s not exclusive – it’s for everyone!  Horay!  It’s bright and bushy tailed, just like the twinkle of Mr Brainwash’s glasses and the growth of his facial hair.

Yes, I know! The likeness is uncanny!

And what did I say to Mr Brainwash?  “Well done mate!” – move over Parkinson – and make us a brew and a theme tune whilst you’re at it.

Mr Brainwash’s exhibition is held at the Old Sorting Office, 21-31 New Oxford Street, London and runs till 31st August 2012.

For more information on Thierry Guetta click on the link below …

And for that Banksy film …